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I thought there was more unity if we put these things behind us. What changed my mind is how my kids responded to color blind Dad. My kids are surrounded by White people and do not like Black culture or understand what it is to be Black. My kids are not attracted to other Black people because in this European culture, it is not attractive. I decided that it does more harm to forget racial differences than to point them out. It is okay to be different. It is okay to point out in history where White people in general treated all other people poorly because they could. We can work together only when acknowledgement of the great damage to my people is recognized because I have to live with it every day with minorities who love themselves based on how White they are. We have to recognize that we are different and that it is okay to point it out. What does working together look like to you?
That is a great question. You need to put in the work' sounded to me absurdly vague, not to mention boring and 'heavy' sounding. Think of it this way. Let's say YOU are single and you want to get married. You are also kind of shy. To get from single to married, you might say you're 'going to have to put in the work' but what does that mean? Like quitting drinking, a lot of the 'work' to be done is not instantly obvious. Start going out more and socialize. Get a dating app and profile. Now let's say you are an alcoholic and you want to be able have the SKILLS to live life as good or better than before without alcohol. Treat my mental health as a REAL and TOP priority. That means I don't drink, I don't constantly ignore sleep, I PRO-actively reduce negativity (eg endlessly reading anger-inducing news websites). I have a non-negotiable exercise routine to ensure that I get enough dopamine to be mentally stabilized. Also being fit improves my mental state. Consciously knowing in advance what things trigger me to drink and how to deal with tgem. Etc etc simple things like that. The goal is to focus on things that develop my skills to live at least as good or better than while drinking.

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And it will become wildly popular and she'll sell millions of copies. I couldn't even make sense of what any of that was. On the plus side, I got to be the horror story for the sexy time woman later that night. After mediocre sexy time on my part since it had been a while, I started to have a mid-life crisis in front of her. Thanks, kenjataimu. Nothing's hotter than listening to a guy question his life choices after sleeping with you. And to top it off, she texted me for sexy time the next weekend, but I was busy. Then I felt too awkward to try after that, or felt like I kind of messed things up, got in my head, still mid-life crisis-ing. And I'm sure I crushed her hopes after that. But on the other hand, she kept referring to herself as a monster and I couldn't determine if she had hemorrhoids or anal warts during sexy time. So maybe I dodged a bullet?
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